This is my story of courage and hope. Courage to stopping my intentional suffering and finding my way to self-kindness as a way to heal. I used to think that in order to be happy it required me to suffer. Now I know that pain is inevitable and suffering is optional. I eased my suffering the moment I listened to my pain, without any judgment or guilt. I let me be me, which meant I was okay with not being okay. It felt foreign, but for the first time ever I finally felt like I was connecting with the real me.