How Much I Love You: From Anonymous

Dear Kids
It took me a long time to find the answers to each of you and my mental pain. I want to say how much I love all 3 of you so much and your each so precious and unique to me.You always have been..before you were even born.This letter is to say I’m sorry for the mistakes I made when you all were growing up. My pain hurt each of you although you each held in your pain and never complained. Your each grown now. Sadly Dad has passed but his spirit made me look in the mirror at myself. It all came flooding out as if Dad was right beside me. I didn’t handle my mental problems like I should have I thought I was normal but deep down I knew I wasn’t and my whole life I beat myself up for not being good enough. That I know scarred each of you. Dad did also say it is time to forgive myself and let go. It was so surreal..I felt cleansed it was a great feeling but it’s because of each of you that I dug deeper in my soul to stop this hating myself so much. Each of you kept me going from the day you were born.You still do cause no matter what I’m going to try to help each of you with the demons that haunt you. And best believe I will kick some butt..lol I know you kids love me even thru the nightmares in life. I had to say I’m sorry for not addressing my mental health properly but I forgive me cause I have you! I’m truly blessed to have you all. I want to help with your healing cause I’m more educated now..I love when you each smile so all I want for the rest of my days is to see happiness joy and big smiles on those gorgeous faces. It’s not to late I promise. Dad is happy now lol he is watching over each of you and wants to see your smiles from Heaven. I love you J N and A from the bottom of my heart Always & Forever I’m here for you. I know your grown but your always Mama’s babies