This is a daily reminder to myself of what I’ve learned and how I want to live.
“Nothing real can be threatened, nothing unreal exists.”
I used to be so scared of not being liked, I used to be so scared of not being good enough. But I have since learned that only love exists. Anything outside of love is just fear. In the Universe, the bigger picture, even that fear is only just an illusion. Only the love is real, only the love was ever real; in any situation. It is easy to forgive someone being unkind to you when you can see it from their fear. It is easy to even forgive your own behavior, that you’re not proud of, when you see it from your own fear.
Love is all there is. When out of sync with that I think, “I am willing to see this differently”. And every time I do. Ask to see the light in any situation, some situations may take longer than others, but eventually you will.
It costs nothing to share love. Be that person that makes someone else feel confident in your presence. When they feel confident, you feel confident. We are all connected.
And when I am struggling with self love, when I am down on my body and in a space of self loathing. When I am intimidated by all the ways society and social media has its effects of teaching us to be insecure in our own skin. I remind myself of this beautiful quote that I read from one of my favorite books ‘Women who run with the wolves’, from the chapter called ‘Joyous body:The Wild Flesh’ – “If she is taught to hate her own body, how can she love her mothers body that has the same configuration as hers? Her grandmothers body, the bodies of her daughters as well? How can she love the bodies of other women (and men) close to her who have inherited the body shapes and configurations of their ancestors ? To attack a woman thusly destroys her rightful pride of affiliation with her own people and robs her of the natural lilt she feels in her body no matter what height, size, shape she is. In essence, the attack on women’s bodies is a far-reaching attack on the ones who have gone before her as well as the ones who will come after her.”
I would never bash my mothers body, my grandmothers body or my future daughters body; so why would I bash my own?
-Torrey Devitto
3 Responses
So true, love wins all.
Love your letter. Thank you!!
Wow, this genuinely brought tears to my eyes! If only they could teach everyone this from the off!! My heart broke when I saw my 7 year old sister for the first time this year and she has started wearing makeup… I struggle so much with confidence too, sometimes I can’t bare to look in the mirror. We should be taught to love our natural beauty! Also, fear is such a scarily powerful emotion that everyone can understand. I know, from my own experiences, how paralysing and awful it can be, so I strive never to hold a grudge against someone for their actions, but instead understand how they were driven to them… Thank you so much for sharing this!!
Thank you for sharing this with us Torrey, I think what you’ve written is very beautifully worded. Every day I struggle with self-love and loathing, anxiety, and convincing myself that I will never be good enough for anyone. Even today. I think you’ve worded it at the end, in an incredibly relatable way: I would never wish any hurt or pain to anyone else, so why is it I can’t convince my inner voice to stop inflicting it upon myself?